Dreams only dreamt

When I grew up, I always wanted to be a fireman. I don’t know exactly why. Wearing that bright red fire hat, rescuing cats from trees, battling raging fires. I guess there was always something interesting happening being a fireman, the sense of danger? Maybe that’s why I signed up to the war.

It was love at first sight when I met Elysia. She had these cute freckles on her nose and her smile just warmed my heart. I loved listening to her talk about her day, her tears, her bursts of laughter. She was the girl I wanted to marry. I just wanted to always be with her and to impress her deeply. Perhaps that’s why I became a soldier.

I always wanted a son. I’d name him Eric. I could imagine him being a real tough boy but gentle as well. As a second child, I wanted to have a daughter. I was still undecided on a name, maybe name her Mary? I wanted my kids to be proud of their father, to know that their daddy defended his country with courage.

I never knew when I would die. If I could pick a time to die, it’d be after I see my children’s children grow up. That would be ideal. I never knew I’d see my life bleed away at the age of eighteen.

Everyone has dreams and aspirations for their life. I never let go of mine, I kept them with me as I sailed to the front, treasured them as I fought the battles and watched them slip away as I faded away in the muddy trenches.

I now look around as the world passes by each year. I see men rushing off to work, children playing in the backyard and mothers tending to the clothes - each with their own ambitions and dreams. I notice couples saying ‘I do’ to each other, I watch as firemen race off to the rescue and I look about as sons and daughters head off to school each day. Peace abounds in the air. Freedom roams their lives.

I was never able to experience life like they do, to feel and touch a life’s desire; to marry, to sip tea in the sunset, to play with the grand kids. The things I desired in my life were never realised.

I gave up my dreams so you could have yours.